A History Of Poulton Special Feature !

The Great Poulton Pram Race

"Blackmail Corner" presents a special one off feature. Rescued from the archives of Alan Billingtons photo collection and digitised for your pleasure see our intrepid pram racers push their babies round the local hostelries collecting charitable donations as they go.

And if you don't want to see more of this sort of thing then you'd better keep the money coming. Make cheques payable to "Honest Vern" and send all cash, cheques, valuables and offers of sexual favours to "Behind the big bins, Booths car park, Poulton-Le-Fylde." Remember kids, the more you send the less gets published !

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Brian and Brian decide to start the day with a quick loosener in the Golden.

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But now it's time to get into their trolleys to start the race (makes a change from them getting off their trolleys -ed)

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And they're off ! Ash' and Ogs are slightly ahead but a very fetching Col and Chewy ae only inches behind.

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And after a quick stop at the Old Town hall they;re off again. As usual with Poulton "sporting" events htere's a stop in every pub !

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Meanwhile Brain and Brian have decided to stay at the Golden for "just one more" They've worked out they'll soon catch up the rest of the field. (this is worse than Wack races - ed.)

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Racing into the lead it's Ange and Al who speed past the Rozzers.

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Wait a minute now they're heading back to the Golden Ball ? What's going on here ? (At this point You'll have realised that the pictures have been scanned in completely the wrong order and we're trying to make the best of a bad job. Well at least some of us are. - ed.)

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Oh that's right Ogs left his fags behind so they're going to have a swift pint then start again.

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Now they're making their way into the Thatched where Ez attempts to unseat Ogs from his pram vantage point. Luckily Ian and Jane are on hand to keep order.

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You can't give booze to a baby !

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Brian and Ange swap stocking tips whilst baby Brian refills his pacifier with brandy.

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Lads, lads... for the last time this is supposed to be a race around Poulton, you can't keep rushing back to the Golden Ball every other pint - even if there is a special offer on on "Low Eye Brow" today.

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That's more like it Al and Ange are forced to abandon pram and run to avoid being run over by an encroaching number two (that's a number two bus - ed.).

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Closely followed by Ash and Ogs who are neck and neck with Ian and Ez (n.b. Ez wasn't officialy in the race he was just drunk so Ian decided to help out by commandeering a passing trolley)

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Back at the Golden Ball the Brians have run out of money so are attempting to drum up some passing trade. Leave it out Lads, I'll get you both a pint.

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Meanwhile in the posh end the Buffalos have heard rumours of a bunch of deviants swanning round the village dreseed as ladies. Thankfully they soon find out they're "our" deviants so that's alright then. Meanwhile up on the screen Mr. Weller wonders just what they put in the water round here to produce such a village full of drunken loons !


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